Panel four of the original version of the previous page has replaced the original panel four of this page. Wakeman’s head-turn was acceptable – Grij’s hand on his shoulder was wince-worthy and Wakeman saluting is simply one of the shittiest pieces of “art” I’ve created, ever. To mitigate The Horror, useable panels got moved around and the page was given …
Minor cleanup and a full rewrite. The captions stick close to the original script and have been tweaked more for technical accuracy and relevance than anything else. Mastering notes, 2016.12.06 – Corrected timestamp formatting.
The biggest changes here: removal of “overheard” type and the book Alias is reading – it used to be an “experimental” DCR cover, but has since been changed to Barghosa Utility Spacecraft Model 238 Operations Manual Volume 1,” which vibes with Grij’s statements in the previous scene, and the U-238 shots on the previous page. Not that you can read …
Major cleanup points: Panels two, three, and four – The shadow Alias casts on his hair; the overall lighting around Dyluck, and then Alias’s jaw and hair in panel four. The “overheard” text is by far the biggest change to the entire scene – in this case, I figure that it fits better if the “locational” text and the “overheard” …
Amazing what some elbow grease in the right places can do to otherwise horrible artwork. Mostly intact, the panel changes are relatively minor in volume, but have a major impact on overall image quality. That or I’m talking out my ass and fixing mistakes you never noticed the first time around. Mastering notes, 2016.12.06 – A major dialogue adjustment, enforcing …
Read, read, read those bits of Times New Roman. Seriously. PLOT!. Less cleanup than I’d like – considering the shading methods I used for this scene, it would almost be easier to re-shade than it would be to repair… though that would involve re-learning the technique I used during this period. Which…. yeah. Let’s just not think about that, shall …
Panel layout has been reordered – it’s much more effective this way, I think. Also, Malky’s glasses have bows. Something they don’t for about the first half of the story, which makes it the craziest bit of continuity editing, by far. Also, as per personal guidelines, this is the only time coke is mentioned explicitly – whenever the stuff is …
BLACK SPACE OF DOOM. Also, cropping. There’s going to be a lot of cropping… and with older pre-CG pages, that probably means sacrifices. The overall composition hasn’t suffered, but it has gotten a bit more… cramped. And cleaned up, somewhat. Mastering notes, 2016.12.06 – Minor dialogue adjustments.
Out of the rebuilt pages for this scene, this one has transitioned the most cleanly. It’s also one of the few pages to retain “eye of Sauron” shots following the massive purge late in the production of the first edition. Mastering notes, 2016.12.06 – Minor dialogue adjustments.
Raven has a proper thumb now (as well as an ear, lighting, etc) – the rest of the reformatting was a mix of careful tweaks (Tantek’s head in panel four, for example) and “awww, fuck it!” (most of the rest of the page, really). The hard split between Raven and Tantek (turning what was panel four and five in the …
Tantek now has a thumb instead of what xeno calls a “thib,” and the wall of panel one has been extended quite a bit – this way the scene is preserved without undue cropping or empty space. Raven (in the same panel) now has an ear. Heehee. Pony. Mastering notes, 2016.12.06 – Minor dialogue adjustments.
Minor cleanup, mostly to the visible hand. Like the other single-panel “icon” pages, this one hasn’t been scaled down, just bordered and tweaked a bit. One potential hardcopy issue is that the side borders, in almost all cases, tread very closely to the maximum “trim” border. For the second edition, they’re no longer full bleed pages (a la the much …
Reformatted, featuring some cropping problems and convergence issues, most of which have been sorted out to my satisfaction. Not too much in the way of cleanup – the lighting in this scene makes a thorough scrub a serious pain in the ass. Mastering notes, 2016.12.06 – Minor caption adjustments.
Aspect ratio of 2-5 have been preserved, 1 has been inserted at its full original size, and 6 and 7 have been cropped a bit. Cleanup focus has been on the usual nits, as well as evening out Thad’s glasses in panel two – probably the one thing that’s the most obvious at webscale. Mastering notes, 2016.12.06 – Minor caption …
This is technically the fourth pass over this scene. “Sketch” edition, “Crap” edition, 3×4 edition, 6×9 edition… the fact that this page and the last haven’t needed much in the way of work is one hell of a bonus for me, really. Straight ports for both, with new, slightly-reworded words. Words I may change later, in favor of something a …
Mastering notes, 2016.12.31 – For some reason the metadata for this chapter was never updated to reflect the second edition cover… which I suppose is now the third edition cover – devised in 2009 and tweaked a bit during production cleanup in late 2016.
Fairly straightforward, going more for cropping than scaling. In this case the linework is separated from the backgrounds – usually the second edition panels are merged, though in this case I figured keeping the art and backgrounds separate would give me some wiggle room for type… and also makes it easier to patch Raven’s hair. Tantek’s been nudged around a …
Rather than crop for width, panels one and two have had their respective skies raised. The intent for panel four WAS for it to match for scale with the panels of the next page, but… long story short, that would have required even MORE adjustment work to the top three. So things become mildly inconsistent for a page or two. …
Was Convergence -1- in the first edition. I’ve sniped the first two pages of that scene (in terms of naming conventions, anyway), so now Convergence starts when Raven hits Oz Two. The “descent” of R & T was originally just a two page splurt to kick off that scene… since that bit was effectively expanded during the first First Edition …
More headspace for Raven in panel four, along with some basic cleanup and scrubbing. And continuity – pip! I’m pretty sure that’s the last one I forgot. I hope. Also background tweaks and overall replacement, a la the previous page. The huge increase in headspace really works here – for once I had an overblown amount of dialogue that I …