20141215, 09:06 – The first page of the Naomi edit!

10:21 – Tweaked a total of four panels. Moved the Daedalus down in panels one and five, rebuilt Naomi’s face in panel two and tweaked Shannon and Naomi in panel three. I also eliminated references to the “iron lung” and “totally secure comms” an favor of cleaner dialogue with lower overhead, and I eliminated an extremely crude couple of lines of dialogue – panel three is now a lot simpler and, I think, funnier for the effort. Naomi’s still crude, mind you – just a bit less in this instance.

Second Edition Metadata

Relatively minor changes – new renders, one or two tweaks to the linework… and a horrible joke. So horrible. So awesome. Awesomer than the art, anyway – I’d redraw it all, but it’s already been fixed once, dammit. Once is enough!

Or should be – this is a page that’s been “fixed” three times now.

A lot of the work in this chapter has been adjusted once or twice already. Remember, it was produced before Signal (the first chapter), and in many ways epitomizes the flaws of the story and the early development process. Too many short scenes, lots of flaws – I was switching environments and characters too quickly to get comfortable (and hence, “good”) with any particular one (or two or three etc), the entire cast was still relatively new and still had to get the art bugs worked out… and it was around now that I was starting to realize this project was going to be anything but easy.

Cast

  • Naomi Houston

    A former Marines Corps Navigator, Naomi handles the Daedalus whenever West has other priorities. Hotheaded and irreverant, Naomi swears like a sailor and is known for making impulsive piloting decisions, with a marked tendency...

  • Shannon Israel

    The Daedalus communications officer, Shannon picks up languages the way most people pick up song lyrics. A native of the Terran-adjacent pocket universe of Alleste (4.0), Shannon works with West as a means of...

Glossary Articles

  • Daedalus

    A Javelin class Am-capable high speed cargo transport, the Daedalus is the property of ex-Templar Captain John West. The workhorse of a shady courier service run out of the Australian outback in a nearby...

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